We will now continue with our regularly scheduled program...

Wow. I had not realized it had been so long since I had been on here. Anybody still here?




Anybody?




No one?




Oh, well. I don't mind talking to myself. Besides, my narcissistic tendencies are starting to overpower me.

So much time has passed. And so much has happened.

Or maybe not so much.

Let's see. I have gained 14 pounds since my last recorded weigh-in (which was in July). Gasp! 14 pounds.

Eek! That's a lot. Wow (shaking my head)....sorry, I'm just shocked that I have gained that much. No wonder I was starting to feel heavy. No wonder I was starting to feel like a stuffed sausage about to explode from it's casing. No wonder my entire body was starting to moan and groan while all this strain was put on it.

My poor body.

It has gone through so much. And yet, it has never let me down. I have used and abused my body for more than 22 years. I have fed it with the most unhealthiest foods you can think of. I have let it sit idle while it screamed for activity. I have let it balloon to the size it is now.

And again, it has never let me down.

I have never had a major illness or sickness. Never broken bones or severely injured myself. Besides being overweight and the slight high blood pressure, I have never had any major problems with my health.

Never has my body failed me. And all my life, I have failed my body.

I truly am an ungrateful person. There are people battling for their lives because their bodies are giving up. There are people who are wishing they could run or walk or do normal physical activities, but can't because their bodies won't let them.

And here I am, with a body that would do anything to please me, and all I have done is laughed in its face and I have treated it with such inconsideration.

Writing this brings tears to my eyes because I can't believe I have been so careless. I can't believe I have been so evil and mean to something that has been so good to me. The way my body looks is my fault. But the way my body functions, moves and heals itself is a gift from God.

It is time to start showing a little gratitude for this precious gift.

I'm feeling Hefty

Well, I got a lot out of Reason #1. A whole day of working out. Not working out all day, but a workout. I'll explain.

My Tuesday had started off not so great. I had a crappy breakfast and ate some crappy food throughout the day. But then I got some things off my chest. And after that, I felt super duper awesome throughout the rest of the day. Especially at the gym. I hopped on to the elliptical machine and worked my little huge flat butt off. Yes, I pushed myself and kept going over and over that post in my head until I had completed one hour straight on that damn machine. My boyfriend was very impressed. Heck, I was impressed. And I never did believe in that whole talking to and pumping yourself up sort of thing. I guess I showed myself.

But I wasn't prepared to milk that one amazing feat for the next 2 days. You know what I'm talking about. "I ate a healthy breakfast and lunch, so one bag of Hershey kisses won't hurt me" or "I've been working out so good during the week, I'm going to eat whatever I want on the weekend." The whole justifying your bad habits is totally warped but I am a pro at it. So, because of one measly hour of amazing huffing and puffing, I gave myself 2 days off at the gym.

And my eating has been....there are no words.

Wait, yes there are.

Wednesday - Friday = fast food nation.

Seriously though, I am so tired of fast food. I am craving a good, light, home-cooked meal. Man, they are right. You are what you eat. I've been eating shit and now I look and feel like shit. Oh, how I hate when they are right.

To get rid of this crappy feeling, this weekend is going to be full of workouts and great, healthy, and yummy food. I will pump my chubby legs until they can't pumps no more. I will have to get my cook on as the head chef is on vacation here at Casa Fatty Pants. I'm thinking of trying to convince the boyfriend to fire up the grill for some BBQ tomorrow. Add lots and lots of water to that mix and this weekend should be gravy.

And maybe those 2 pounds, that I pretended to not see this morning on the scale, will be gone.

For good.

P.S. Obviously I'm not an expert, but seriously, if you are having a hard time getting through workouts or even starting a workout, think long and hard about one thing you want. To fit into some shorts, to lose 5 pounds, to not be so jealous of other girls (ahem), etc. Really, think about it. Think about that and only that. It'll make your workout a piece of cake. Trust me.

So....

I took a break this past week from weight loss. I ate what I wanted. I haven't stepped in the gym since last Tuesday. I just haven't been into it. And even though I am one hundred pounds overweight, it's OK.

But to tell you the truth, I feel awful. I'm bloated. I'm cranky. And I just don't feel right.

I still wouldn't feel right trying to get back into it, though. My head isn't there. At least not yet.

I've given myself until Saturday night. Ready or not, I need to get into weight loss mode starting Sunday morning. And the right way. So once and for all, I can lose the weight and keep it off.

Because seriously, I am starting to get sick of this blog.

What's a weight loss blog without any weight loss?

*******************************************

I finally braved the scale this morning. Up 2 pounds. It wasn't as bad as I thought. I actually thought I'd be up to 260 because of all the chips and cookies and soda I've been having. But thank gosh, it's only 2 pounds.

That's only 18,900 calories I need to burn starting on Sunday to get under the 250's.

Psssh....piece of cake. =/

A post about nothing...

Is better than no post at all.

I have been feeling pretty blah lately. About weight loss, about bills, about a certain someones family members. I hate when I let insignificant things bring me down. That's not what life is supposed to be about. I do know I have gotten loads better about enjoying life with what I have and enjoying it with the people that I care about (just ask my boyfriend), but sometimes I find myself slipping back into my "Woe is me" mindset. Grrrr! Oh, how I hate that.

But no more tristeza for me.

I get to go home to the two loves of my life. Thinking about the time I get to spend with them totally brightens my day.

So, Friday was a pretty mediocre (according to the boyfriend) workout day. My knee was really bothering me. That stair master messed me up bad. So all I did was weights and I walked 15 minutes on the treadmill. I didn't even sweat that much.

Saturday and Sunday - there was no workout. There just wasn't time. I loooove to sleep in on the weekends and we had some plans with some of the boyfriend's friends on Saturday, so we didn't get a chance to make it to the gym. We got in pretty late Saturday night, so we slept most of Sunday. Don't you just love those relaxing days where you just sleep, do nothing, and laze around the house? Gosh, how I love those days.

But it was back to business on Monday!! I did all the weight machines that I usually do. Except for the leg one, I'm pretty scared of hurting my knee so I'll stay away from leg exercises for awhile. I got in 15 minutes on the cross ramp and 15 minutes on the treadmill. And I actually jogged for 3 minutes straight! Whoa!! It actually wasn't that hard. But when I tried to do my next interval, my calf started to hurt real bad so I was only able to walk the rest of the way. But I was back to my old, sweaty self.

Oh, yeah, nothing new on the food front. I'm still eating junk food.

Wow, that was a whole lotta post about nothing!!! =D

This is not a good feeling!

Getting back to the gym does not feel great. In fact, being back is downright painful!

The boyfriend and I finally got to the gym last night. It was so tough getting into working out. I was really lazy. I had the worst headache. But I still had to get my butt in there and continue on with some exercise.

I went ahead and did 30 minutes on the cross ramp (I still love that machine!). Then I thought I'd mix it up and try out the stair master. Ohmygoodnessgracious! That thing literally beat me up. I could only last 7 minutes on it. My legs were seriously on fire throughout those entire 7 minutes. And I was out of breath. On level 1. It was pitiful. But at least it was a start.

I finished out the rest of my 23 minutes on the treadmill, no incline. My legs were still burning up so I decided to just walk it out.

Am I only one who gets their butt handed to them on the stairmaster? Is it really that hard or am I just being a weenie (an out of shape one at that)??

My calves are killing me today. So, so sore. But it's back to the gym tonight. The good thing is it is a weight day, so a little less cardio. My legs will be thanking me tomorrow.

Day 13 & Day 14

Saturday
Breakfast: fresh carrot, pear, and apple juice, kashi and milk
Lunch: ajiaco, rice, salad
Dinner: 3 slices of pizza

Things I shouldn't have eaten: 1 PB egg and that 3rd slice of pizza

Workout
ALA

Sunday
Breakfast: chocolate chip pancakes (yummy!!)
Lunch: parmesan chicken with angel hair pasta, salad with fruit
Dinner: rice and plantain (a very small piece)
Snacks: 3 oatmeal cookies (the best oatmeal cookies I have made so far)

Workout
20 minutes HIIT

Completing 2 weeks of consistent workouts feels AMAZING. I really am seeing a difference in my arms and legs. I have yet to see anything in my tummy but I'm guessing that's where the fat is going to go last. =/

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and got a bit discouraged. I have such a long way to go. It's frustrating. I think I am working hard and it's just depressing to think that I may not see results for a long time.

Woe is me.

I just have to take it one day at a time. This is going to be a true test of my patience. I hope this weight doesn't defeat me once again. I'm way too old and I've been like this for way too long now.

Something's gotta give.

Day 9

I have been eating way too much.

And my tummy is not happy with me right now.

I know that when I eat chocolate chip cookies for breakfast, I feel like crap for the rest of the day. So why do I continue to eat chocolate chip cookies for breakfast?

Woe is me.

Anyways...

I was googling exercises this morning and came across a great one. I sit at a desk 8-9 hours a day. Besides, the occasional stroll throughout my suite, I don't get any exercise during the day. The thing is, I sit at the reception area so I can't really do much without getting caught. So, moves I can do underneath my desk are GOLD to me. They save me from some very awkward moments.

I tried this one already and really like it.

Taken from About.com

Leg Extensions

1. Sit tall in a chair or on a ball with the abs engaged.
2. Keeping the body stable, straighten the right leg, foot flexed, and try to bring it up until the leg is parallel to the floor.
3. Lower the leg back down, lightly touching the heel to the floor, and repeat for 16-20 reps before switching sides.
4. You'll feel this in the front of the thighs as well as in the hip flexors of the working leg.

"The leg extension is a simple, classic exercise targeting the quadriceps muscles. This exercise is great for anyone who needs to strengthen the muscles surrounding the knee to provide more stability and support."

You really feel it in the front of your thigh. Trust me.

Any more exercises that can be done incognito, underneath a work desk??

By the way, yesterday was my off day from workout. =)

I have my freedom but I don't have much time

Am I in the right place? Isn't this supposed to be a weight loss blog? I think I'm just going to call it a blog from now on because there is no weight loss happening here.

The scale read 258.4 this morning. Yup, I'm up that 0.8 pounds that I lost last week. I didn't expect much of a loss because I haven't been 100% on point. I have been lots better, but not where I need to be to be losing weight.

Thursday - no workout

See? I told you it's harder for me when the boyfriend isn't working out.

Let me take this time to apologize to my readers (if there are any left). I know some people look to weight loss blogs for motivation and inspiration. I have not been very motivating or inspirational as of late (or ever?). But I think I am like lots of people who are on this journey. We are more talk than action. We know what we need to do, but have a hard time getting it done.

But I truly believe that one day we will have THEE moment where we realize it's time to stop dicking around and finally start doing something.

I hope you guys stick around long enough so that I can share MY moment with you. =)

And she'll never know your story like I do

Woe is me.

Seriously, woe is me.


Have you ever had a 2.5 pound weight fall on your foot?

Believe you me, it hurts hella bad.


But that's not the reason for the woe.

It's been two days since I last worked out.

Tuesday, I got a new present in the mail and I have been waiting all of my life for it, so I played with it some (in case, you're wondering, the present was a Cricut Expression...Tuesday was the happiest day of my life!). Wednesday, the boyfriend has been sick and is in full blown babymewoeisme mode. So, instead of working out, we cuddled in bed watching the lamest movie ever made!! The movie was so bad it was funny, so a good time was had by all.

Now I feel like caca.

Sorry about the visual...by the way, have you guys ever googled POOP? People are so gross!

And I've been stuffing my face with caca, so I'm sure you get the picture on how I am really feeling.


Tomorrow is my weigh in day, so make sure you guys have your dancing shoes on because the pity party will probably continue on 'til then!!

When you gonna give me some time, Sharona?

I'm in a bad mood.

I think it's all this crap I've been eating.

Plus, no workouts.

That makes for a grumpy me.

I didn't get a workout in Friday - Sunday. On Saturday, the boyfriend and I took a train downtown to catch a football match and there was lots of walking involved. Seriously. My entire body was sore Sunday morning. But, according to my boyfriend, that is not an official workout. So last week, I only worked out 3 days. Yeesh. That's been one of my worst weeks.

But I must workout today. My body is seriously craving it. I guess that's what happens when you make it a regular part of your day. Plus, I could use the extra dose of endorphins. Bad moods just kill me.

I'm off to read blogs. They always cheer me up.

Two can make that dream so real

Tuesday - 30 minutes elliptical
Wednesday - off
Thursday - 30 min. elli & arms/abs

I have been doing really well on the workout front. The eating front is another story. I have been eating way too much and all the wrong things. What can I say? I love to eat. And all the bad foods are what my belly wants. And right now, my belly is boss. One day, my brain will take over. Until then, I will still try fighting the good fight.

I changed my weigh-ins to Friday. So this morning, the scale showed a 1 pound loss. That's pretty lame since I have lost this one pound a billion times already. But it keeps creeping back. Man, I want to lose a new pound already. But I know I need to work harder on it. So really, I have no right to complain. But that's me. I like to complain.

Have a great weekend and a Happy Valentine's Day!

Thanks for all you've shown us

That was me yesterday. I don't remember the story so I could be way off, but I had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I was in the worst mood. I didn't feel like getting anything done. And I didn't. It could have been from lack of sleep. My theory is it was from lack of sunshine. I need some time in the sun. These past couple of days have been icky and I haven't spent much time outside. That's where my bad mood came from. That's why kids are always so happy....they spend so much time playing outside in the fresh air.

I need a day of recess.

So, there was no workout and my eating was bleh.

I'm feeling better today. And more productive. Thank God! I hate bad moods and bad days!

Feels like I'm in a race, but I already won 1st place

All of that above is a little less than under 100 calories. Clementines are my new best friend!

I haven't been around because I haven't been doing much. My weigh-in this morning was pretty weak. I have gained 2.2 pounds. Yikes! Not really a good way to start of the New Year.

I know I've said this over and over, but seriously it's time for me to take this weight loss thing seriously. I will not waste another year being overweight. I just can't do it anymore.

What the?

Man, have I been misinformed!

For some reason, I always (well, just until recently) thought that you only got sick once a season. And since I'm pretty much superhuman, I only get sick, like, once a year. After that gnarly sickness I went through in October I thought I was safe for the rest of the cold/flu season. Yeah right! Here I am at my desk, sneezing my brains out and my nose is running like a river. One cold a season, my ass!! Ugh! I hate being sick...and I know exactly who it was who got me here. Gee Boyfriend, thanks for the early X-mas present.

Wednesday
30 minutes elliptical

I actually motivated my boyfriend to work out last night. That's a first. He was looking all lazy-like when I got home from work yesterday. He started in on how he gets two days off a week so he was going to use one of his days off, but then I told him I was going to work out, so he decided to go ahead with his.

See, we BOTH help each other out.

Whoa!

Monday = EPIC Fail

No workout

And that's all I have to say about that.

At least I have a cute outfit on today.

That's all that really matters.

The week is coming to an end...

(And it looks like my weight loss efforts are too...)
Thursday
Breakfast: cottage cheese, pineapple, banana
Lunch: ajiaco, turkey sandwhich
Dinner: rice, potatoes, chicken, green beans
In-betweens: popcorn, 2 tangerines, small piece of brownies that I made

No workout

My eating was way better but I still didn't get a workout in. I had to go take care of some business downtown and there was so much traffic. Driving in traffic makes me really lazy for some reason. So I got home late and I was exhausted! I was in such a pissy mood. Looks like I won't be going downtown for a LONG while.

I know there is going to be a gain this Sunday. And I still feel a bit fluffy. It doesn't help that my jeans were just recently washed and they feel super tight.

I. Can't. Breathe.

Did anyone catch New Moon last night?

First fluffy day in a while...

Monday
Breakfast: cottage cheese, pineapple, turkey sandwhich
Lunch: Michelina Lean Gourmet Shrimp, pasta, and veggies
Dinner: rice, eggplant and meat, 1 tostone, avocado
In-between: coconut cake *cough* 2 slices *cough*, 1 doughnut, 1 apple turnover

Workout: free day

As you can see, I've reverted to my old ways. I ate way too many baked goods yesterday. And I know exactly where they went: my belly. I felt and still feel REALLY fluffy. I'm mad at myself because it's been a while since I've felt that way. I thought I had come a long way, but it looks like I still have a long way to go.

I had to go do some errands last night, so I decided to use my free day for my workout.

Being sick really sucks. Hopefully I'm back by this weekend.

Sleepy

There's not really much to update. Last week consisted of only 2 workout days.

Thursday 30 min. elliptical
Friday-Saturday I was in Lazy-town
Sunday 30 min. elliptical

The scale was down 1.2 pounds this week. It really sucks losing the same pounds over again. I mean, I had already lost these pounds and here I am losing them again.

I have been eating up a storm lately. But I did get some groceries yesterday, so I should be pretty set for the week. Except for that box of Cap'n Crunch cereal I picked up from WalMart. I was craving some cereal, so I picked some up. The bad thing is it's hard for me to stop at just one bowl. Maybe cereal was a bad idea after all. We'll see.

I did do a lot of running around on Saturday (that should count for some exercise). I was picking up groceries and some Halloween (my favoritest day!!) decorations. I was also wearing some shoes that were 2 sizes too small. My feet were about ready to fall off when I got home.

It looks like winter is officially here. What happened to Fall? It was 38 degrees this morning when I left for work. I'm sad because I have no winter shoes (hence, wearing shoes 2 sizes too small). I'm even sadder because my winter clothes don't fit. Boo hoo! Now I really need to lose weight because I think it's going to get much colder so I need to be able to squeeze into my smaller, warmer clothes. I can't go shopping for stuff until the boyfriend starts working, which is hopefully next week! *fingers crossed*. I really hate not having extra cash =(.

Please don't watch this:

I had never heard of it but my brother mentioned it to me and I was in the mood for a Halloween flick. This one was all sorts of wrong. I mean, wow. If you must, check it out and see for yourself. But seriously, wow.

I've been bad...

No workouts for the past 3 days.

No self-control when it comes to eating.

I think I'm back to where I started on the scale (maybe even higher).

Eating crap these past few days is making me feel like crap.

"I can't hide this fluffy feeling..."

=(